I'm fucking Matt Damon

Right, so you spend a wonderful time in Amsterdam (I'll tell you about this later this week if I find the time) from where you come back exhausted like Hercules after his 12 labours. You have an "easy" day in the office (where "easy" means you only worked 10 hours). And you decide to go home and have an easy night: cook, laundry, check your mail...
But your flatmate is back from Australia and you have to celebrate, so instead of all those nice-guy things you just open 2 bottles of wine and get pissed as a monkey. Well, shit happens. You switch TV to watch Boogie Nights starring Mark Wahlberg (that freaking guy who turned the 6-pack into a trend just to piss us all off). And on the way YouTube pushes in (that's marketing) and you discover a piece of art that somehow went unnoticed for way too long.
So, you've got Jimmy Kimmel, an American comedian who runs a late night show called, guess? "Jimmy Kimmel Live!". Ok, the guy is good at jokes, but he's not the best at branding. Anyway, he's going out with this girl, also a comedian and called Sarah Silverman, who decides to confess live on his show that she's fucking Matt Damon. And, a comedian as she is, she does so playing a fucking videoclip. Glorious. Grab your ribs tight because they're going to fly fucking far away on a laughing trip...

But that's not the end of it. He's a man. Proud. Selfish. Very macho, just as men should be. And he's running his own show. Oh my. And his girlfriend went to his show to take the piss out of him. That's too much, revenge is necessary. Compulsory. Unavoidable. And there he goes fucking Ben Affleck. And he re-invents the wheel, just rounder. Oh my, indeed he does.

God bless American comedians and New Zelander wine.